the thursday group

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Last Hurrah

To Tehlin,

who made life in HK funny because of her stories
who made lunches and dinners happen because she was thoughtful enough to plan them
who opened her home to the ladies and the PSC later on for drinking, gaming and gossip sessions
who, with her listening ear and sage advice, became a confidante of most of the ladies

You will be missed A WHOLE LOT. Much more than most of us would care to let on. Much more than we do right now.

I've always believed that lifelong friends are made when you're in high school, and the married years see acquaintances come and go. Well, Tehlin, the Thursday Group has proven me wrong.

Here's to you, Chris, Sam, Isabel and your future kids. May you find lasting happiness and comfort in your new home.

The Thursday Group needs new blood!

Monday, February 04, 2008

9 months and blah blah days since the last entry

It's been almost a year since the last entry. But who cares? We all have our own personal blogs, we've been busy looking for work, starting businesses, traveling and having babies. Yet through it all we've managed to celebrate birthdays, Christmas, baby showers, baptisms and cheer each other up during depressing times. We've managed to dance the night away in LKF, get drunk, meet for lunch, merienda and dinner. I'll let the pictures say what we all know to be true: The Thursday group is still going strong.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Then There Were 8

Since this topic relates to the Thursday Group, I thought I should finally enter a legitimate piece on this blog.

On Monday we had a what may be the last get together at Jeremie's place. She's leaving for NY next month and unlike Ragamuffin Girl and me, we're not sure if they're going to change their minds after they get there and come back after a few months. We gave Shanghai 6 months, surrendered and came back. It took Ragamuffin Girl 4 months in Canada before they came back too. We're hoping Jeremie might be gone for 3 months only and then come back, since the pattern seems to be a decreasing number of months away for the Thursday ladies who have left.

Then a few months from now, Maryheart will be leaving for California! She's leaving in a few weeks to look for a place to stay and a school for her kids. With the way she operates, we know once she decides to leave, it'll be a definite thing. Why does she have to be so efficient!?

It's going to be alot quieter without the 2 of them in Hong Kong. Ever since Shyguy started working, we rarely get to see her anymore. Midicrux published a book recently, so she's been busy for what seems like months now. Mayapapaya, although she was working from home up to a few weeks ago was technically "free", was difficult to coax out of her working attire which was her pajamas. But now that she's out of her pajamas, she started flying off to Manila due to her new business. Ragamuffin Girl we don't get to see as much anymore either since she started work teaching cooking classes. Pam had been busy creating wonderfully baked breads. Now in addition to being the go-to gal when it comes to photography and techie questions, we'll have to add great bread baker too. Mae on the other hand had been busy traveling. And I had been a lazy-ass getting out of the house since I had Nachos. But although its sad that we don't get to see each other as much anymore, its even better knowing we've all evolved in some way and have moved on and kept busy.

The Thursday group has been my life line since I moved to Hong Kong. To this day I am grateful to Abi who introduced me to the initial group 4 years ago. And I am thankful that somehow the combination of all our personalities gelled and we have maintained this group to this day.

We are going to miss Jeremie and Maryheart dearly. There will be no way for us to fill the hole when they leave. Hopefully we'll all still do our best to stay in touch and visit as much as possible. Hong Kong is mostly a stop over for most of us, and when the time comes for the rest of us to move on as well, I'm sure we'll all still call ourselves the original Thursday group.

Hey ladies when that day comes, we better start having Thursday group lunches in different countries. Although we won't be able to meet every week anymore, we better at least meet every year! How cool would that be?

Saturday, February 10, 2007

blog revisited

I miss this!

someone post, please?

Friday, August 25, 2006

My first week as her mother

I had no milk. My daughter had gone on full breast-feeding for six days, and yet I had no milk. That Friday evening, I spent the whole night up and about, playing her music ("Enjoy the Silence", Tori Amos' version) and a few lullabies so she could go to sleep. She looked pale, shrivelled, and upset.

I held her upon my breast for as long as I could until she fell asleep while feeding.

But I had no milk. After two hours, she woke up, and I was denied any possibility of getting a good night's sleep.

In the morning, a frantic father and an anxious, helpless mother rushed their hungry child to a clinic, fed her promptly, and decided that breast-feeding was not the best recourse for their eldest daughter.

Thus the stories began: the birth of an instinctively protective mother who, to this day, holds her daughter close to her bosom even as the little one trots away independently as the years pace; and, the three-year recovery of a tired yet grateful heart.

Friday, August 18, 2006

maternally speaking

ang hirap maging nanay.

It's a hearbreaking, heart-bursting job. Sometimes you are so proud of your little one your heart almost literally bursts with happiness, gigil, and you want to squeeze him, hug him, love him until the end of time.

And yet, there are those moments when you can't stand who he is, what he does, and are afraid of who he will become. And you can't feel this way. You are not God, you can't mould him, control him. You are a mother. A paragon of virtue, patience, understanding, commitment, loyalty.

When I feel like being a M.M. (monster mom: one who screams and throws a fit much worse than her toddler; this part of me I pacified by sending my little one to school for half a day, everyday, when he was just shy of three), I reminisce. I look back on the 3 weeks my boy spent in the NICU, tubes and all, hanging on for dear life. His chest would heave from his crying fits, his pitiful cries brought about by extreme hunger. At one point his chest caved in and the paedia suspected he had congenital heart disease. I cried every single day from the day I left my hospital bed until the day I brought him home. I visited him everyday for 30 (three-zero short minutes) and all I could do was offer a finger and bawl my eyes out. I felt my world was ending there and then. I have to reminisce to keep things in perspective. To remind my M.M. self that petty things, trivial arguments, age-appropriate tantrums and the like are best dealt with an open mind anda heart full of empathy.

Mothering can be so laborious. For some, it even proves fatal and dangerous (especially if you're off your rocker to begin with). Oftentimes I find myself writing about my motherly frustrations, wanting to vent on a computer's pages, and in the next instant I am horrified at my words and proceed to delete them. Perhaps in deleting them electronically I secretly hope they disappear emotionally as well. This time I'm not deleting a word. I want to be able to look back and say that I was an honest mother. Not perfect, rarely patient, frequently unkind, unreasonably sarcastic, only human, but very much in love with my little boy. Motherhood for me is living out all the maxims about imperfect love, tough love, in its purest, most solid form.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

His father's son

Last weekend we entered Marathon Sports and Joaquin tried on some Crocs - those rubbery, colorful beach clogs full of holes that look adorable on kids but horrible on adults (note: The Manolo hates it and thinks it's one of the ugliest shoes ever invented).

After trying on 2 different sizes, he suddenly removed the ones on his feet, tossed them aside and bellowed for his leather sandals. I thought he hated the things and our shopping trip was over. But no, he gets one of his sandals and places a croc beside it, end to end (or underside to underside) and declares to all: "Look, they are not the same size!"

What astounds me is that this is something his dada does all the time when he buys shoes (and Joaquin rarely accompanies us on these shopping trips so how did he remember? Or is it his own habit, a charming part of his personality?). Hubby is so conscious if his shoes look too big or small on his frame. So he never fails to compare the ones he is about to buy with the ones he is wearing. Joaquin did just that, and was bothered about the slight size difference. In any case, I convinced him they fit perfectly so he joyfully quipped: "All right, let's buy them then!".

It amazes me, the words/sentences/phrases that come out of my son's mouth. Comical at best, it can get scary at times: "What is sex, mama?" --from my three year old!

Hmmm, I wonder if Derrick was as insatiably curious and cheeky when he was younger. Probably.